My Story

My testimony demonstrates that K-12 practices are too biased, too manipulative, and too disempowering to ensure a fair internal sexual harassment trial. Instead, superintendents and school boards can cover up the truth and intimidate the survivor through victim blaming statements and workplace mobbing. They also can leave the survivor unprotected with vague policies, insensitive interviews, partial investigations, and weak sex discrimination training.

After verbalizing an informal statement in 2011, I was never told what conclusion my school district came to (i.e., was it misconduct or harassment) or what the difference was between sexual misconduct and sexual harassment. In my 2011 informal report with my principal, I was never asked clarification questions, informed about my perpetrator’s version of what occurred, or told where I could offer additional evidence on my behalf. I also was never told where I could find my school district’s policy should I want to understand its practices or later complete the formal paperwork. 

Indeed, I asked to go off record, and my principal agreed. He knew I was afraid yet did nothing to calm my fears. He did not reassure me I would be protected if I faced retaliation. He did not promise to protect me should I experience retaliation or later check in with me to see if I was experiencing any retaliation. (I did, in passing, tell him in a much later conversation that my perpetrator had stopped, but I had to initiate the conversation). He did not state my concerns would be taken seriously or tell me I could legally file a complaint with the EEOC, at any time, if I was unhappy with how the district handled the situation. He never demanded, for the safety of our students and staff, that I go on record. He did, however, tell me I was taking my situation too far when I expressed fear my colleague could act the same way towards our students. In the end, 

I was left unprotected legally, mentally, and emotionally.

My district’s decision to implement an insufficient sexual harassment policy has always been in their interest, not mine. My district’s 2018 formal findings report was traumatic for me as it occurred in a school setting by administrators who were expected to understand and attend to the needs of victims and who are expected to protect children from anyone with a history of lewd sexual conduct. A two-hour meeting with the school district’s lawyer in 2018 and the subsequent investigative report that followed document my claims.

When I filed my formal report in 2018, my school district did not contact all three of my witnesses who I stated were aware of the sexual harassment and who knew I confronted my perpetrator in 2011. They claimed they were unable to locate one and failed to identify any methods they used to find them. They also did not explain why they did not contact all the people I referenced during my interview. 

Finally, similar to my informal 2011 report, the administration never met with me after my 2018 investigation to ensure I was not experiencing retaliation from filing my formal charge. They were, however, interested in protecting the bystanders who were interviewed as a result of my allegation. Their names were left out of their report while my identity was completely disclosed to them. The district’s decision to seal their identifies, to date, still leaves me confused which teacher was interviewed and which teacher was not.

Then, despite this incomplete investigation, they ruled the events were “offensive and inappropriate” and not sexual harassment. In other words, while they could have ruled my narrative was “unsubstantiated,” they instead issued a conclusive finding that the actions of my perpetrator were only misconduct. They exonerated my perpetrator, my principal, and their administrative practices based on an incomplete investigation. 

In the end, the school district exonerated itself. To date, I have no idea what happened after I made my informal complaint in 2011. They did not offer my principal’s testimony about that matter, even after I pointed out in my 2018 that I did not know what he did after I left his office. I also have no idea what punishment, if any, my perpetrator received for what the district deemed as sexual misconduct, either in 2011 (if they did anything after my meeting with the principal or in 2018 (after my formal report). They purposefully did not tell me any actions that might have been taken, keeping me in the dark intentionally. 

After reading their biased report, I decided not to appeal my district’s “findings.” First, my intentions in 2018 were not to determine what happened in 2011. I knew what had happened: I reported sexual harassment, stated I wanted to go off record, and was allowed to do so. My goal was also not to reprimand my perpetrator either. While I thought they should have faced the consequences of their actions, I contacted the district to know my free speech rights regarding my 2011 report. Going into the investigation, the district told me they would not answer this question. Instead they advised me to get a lawyer. I had already joined my teacher’s union, who told me to complete the investigation in order to protect myself legally. I saw it as fair as it gave the district a chance to protect themselves legally too. 

It is worth noting that I was wholly unsatisfied with my union representation when I filed my 2018 report. First, they interviewed me with my perpetrator’s legal counsel in the room the entire time. When I questioned them about this via an email, they told me they had not broken any laws. Second, they sent me mixed messages on whether they would or would not represent me. I was not a union member in 2011 as I had just started a family and was at the bottom of my pay scale. My perpetrator was a union member in 2011. In an email, they promised to have a union representative walk me through the HR department and the legal department yet they never clarified what this help looked like or when it would specifically end. Consequently, I was completely caught off guard when my union rep told me days after I got the district’s report that they were done helping me. They absolutely knew I disagreed with the report and wanted to appeal. They were also aware I had already tried to find a lawyer and had failed. Yet that is where they left me: alone. My union said it was to protect me legally. I certainly did not feel protected legally as I remained confused how I could or could not talk about my experiences as a sexual harassment survivor. 

Nevertheless, in late 2019 and early 2020, I contacted my state government, telling them I was a sexual harassment survivor who was allowed to go off record with a sex discrimination allegation. I told them my 2018 investigation was partial. I told them I wanted to be able to speak about my sexual harassment experience freely, without any fear of losing my job. I told them I knew there was at least one other person who worked for my district who was sexually harassed, and was gas lit like I was. I told them I knew this because this information was in recorded notes I took from a session with my therapist.

This contact included both Democrats and Republicans. In fact, I emailed every state legislator listed on my state’s webpage. Whatever their party platform, they got contacted. I emailed my Governor as the leader of the Department of Education and the legislators in charge of our state’s education committee. Nationally I reached out to all three of my congressional leaders. To ensure I contacted both parties, I also emailed the national Democrat party leaders in both houses. What I got from all of this correspondence was completely shocking.

Some legislators were silent. Some emailed back victim blaming statements like “I think the system works fine” or “You should have gone on record with this to begin with” or “Why didn’t you appeal if you thought their investigation was partial?” Others seemed indifferent, wondering if I could draft up a legal proposal of the legislation I had in mind so they did not have to go through the headache of doing so themselves. One had their office call to tell me what I experienced was illegal yet then went on to do nothing to ensure it did not happen again. In the end, despite all this self-advocacy, my district’s policies remained unexamined and my state’s Title IX laws have changed in only one way: now interns are covered from sexual harassment.

Apparently, no one else is alarmed at the condition of our country’s K-12 sexual harassment policies. There is also the possibility they did not believe me (which is an example of how victim blaming statements drive our practices) or hoped I would tire out and go away (which irresponsibly puts the commitment to gender equity and student rights in the survivor’s court, not the collective community’s hands).

Still wanting to speak about my experiences, during the summer of 2020 I requested the district reopen my case and offer a more impartial investigation. I also stated I had new information that included a new eyewitness. They refused. In November of 2020, I filed a new complaint alleging retaliation for filing a sexual harassment complaint. This lengthy document covered my experiences from 2011 to 2020. The district’s lawyer than stated my 2018 complaint investigated retaliation and I could not, therefore, file a complaint. He remained obstinate even after I pointed out how foolish it was to claim my 2018 report covered retaliation when I had not even experienced it yet in 2019 or 2020. He again stated I could not file a report. I did not listen to him and filed a complaint anyways. My complaint covered multiple stories of retaliation I experienced that involved workplace mobbing and gas lighting, an issue I referenced in my 2018 interview but never discussed.

After I filed the complaint, the Human Resource director came to my office demanding I demonstrate I was psychologically able to complete my work. After I presented a note from my therapist (as they required), they still refused to address the problem. After they ignored my complaint, I went to the EEOC with a formal charge of retaliation. I also filed a formal complaint against my labor union as they appeared indifferent to my workplace mobbing and sex 

discrimination complaint.

To date, the district has never responded to either my 2020 retaliation complaint or my 2021 EEOC complaint. They have never responded to my workplace bullying complaint, neither answering my questions, contacting my list of witnesses, nor interviewing the employees involved. I have proven I am of a sound enough mind to work there mentally and continue my employment there today. Yet their silence has caused me to reason that any future complaint I file can likewise be ignored. I think “if they did not respond to this complaint, why would they take my next investigation seriously?” This conclusion, along with ongoing mobbing, led me to withdraw from every school committee and leadership role I held. I painfully realized that I could not manage all the psychological terror I encountered when I worked with my mobsters. By the spring of 2021, I knew volunteer activities put me in a situation where I could be bullied by staff only to have a subsequent report filed with the school district completely ignored. My union, meanwhile, offered no support or reconciliation.  In the end, both agencies left me with a partial, complete investigation, and both were unwilling to support my request to investigate my retaliation and workplace mobbing complaint. I knew my clams were true. I had noticed a pattern where the district gas lit and mobbed sexual harassment survivors. I believed I had evidence to prove it. Yet no one would listen to me. 

This webpage is a by-product of failed attempts to address my concerns. I have privately tried multiple times to be heard. I wanted people to know what I experienced was awful and that I knew it would (did) happen again. After I knew in the fall of 2018 there was another sexual harassment survivor in my city who was also gas lit, I felt compelled to do something. After my legislative efforts failed, I felt like I had no choice but to go back to my district. After my retaliation and workplace bullying complaint was ignored, I felt like I had no choice but to go public. I had tried every other means and failed. I never imagined in 2018 I would be where I am today. I never wanted to lead a political cause or rally some sort of cultural movement. I just wanted someone to hear my story, to take me seriously, and to have a dialogue with me on how we could make sure it did not happen again to other employees. To this end, I made the webpage. And now, with humility and faith, I cling to God’s promise that He will make something good come out of my story.